deadline monkey in a cowboy hat https://stolisomancer.livejournal.com/84226.html
Damnation is presently getting worked like a speed bag by gaming reviewers, and for the most part, it's justified. It's not the product of talented people; it's incoherent, glitchy, and utterly without challenge. There are a couple of ideas in it that are worth exploring, or so I thought until I realized that everything I liked is more or less taken straight from
Uncharted, then dropped into
Gears of War. Sort of.
(I fucking hate reviewers or writers who describe a game or movie in terms of what other products it most closely resembles; it does a disservice to the original work by portraying it as shamelessly derivative. That said, when something clearly
is shamelessly derivative, like
Dante's Inferno, there's no reason not to call it on that.)
Plus, this shit is officially ridiculous. I mean, look at this character design.
I'm a man who enjoys breasts, even fictional ones, but this is supposed to be a hard-bitten guerilla fighter, trapped behind enemy lines in a nation gripped by steampunk civil war. Even better, if you see her in-game, they took the time to adjust her model so it looks like she's
realistically sweating, which is about twice the effort they put into the gameplay.
Enemies in
Damnation behave sort of like mobs in
WoW, where they don't realize you're there unless you get close or you shoot one of them. Their "patrol pattern" is about five feet wide.
Why am I bringing this up?
Because
Damnation is the
comedy hit of the year.
I don't know who wrote this game, but they're going for inadvertent comic genius with every line, aided by some really wooden voice acting and a completely batshit plot. I'm only on the first level and I've already heard lines like:
"Make his death painful. I want him to remember it."
I'm going to update this post as I go, but seriously: this is just getting funnier. At this point, I'm in this for the chuckles.
(Said out of nowhere, without context, during an elevator ride.)
"Prescott has a new weapon."
"A weapon? But they are civilians."